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A mother’s love

I love the fact that there is a day set aside to celebrate our mothers for everything they have done for us.

Thank you
For always protecting us against the evils of the world like a lioness would guard over her cups but allowing us to make mistakes in order to learn a lesson.
For loving us unconditional through all our faults, there is nothing greater than a mother’s love, understanding and forgiving heart.
The silent prayers they would say without us knowing and the sleepless nights cause of us.

As we celebrate Mother’s day today, let’s make time to spend with our mother’s, no gift is greater for her that spending time with her kids and seeing them happy. Let’s create amazing memories while our mother’s are still health and in good shape. Because there is a child somewhere in the world wishing they had there mother around, to be able to feel their mother’s love or just to see her for one last time, never take your mother for granted cause you never know when you will lost her. Don’t wait for her funeral to celebrate her do it now and not only on mother’s day but every single day of the year.

I always thank God for blessing me with a mother like mine, a strong independent woman with heart as big as the ocean with so much depth. You instilled powerful values in me, my brother and sister, that of always being respectfully, the art of being thankful and sharing the little we have even if it’s the last thing we have and always take our problems to God through prayer and lastly to how to be responsible independent individual.

I will be forever thankful for all the sacrifices you have made for us and still making. The early morning, the late evenings and for always being able to make us happy with the little you had.

Your happiness means the world to me, my time on earth will not be enough to repay everything you have done.

Make sure to treat your mom today in your own special way.

To my Mom and all mother’s we love you and we can’t imagine life with you but the fact that you have made us so strong to be able to handle anything if you are not around.

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Little part of me, Uncategorized

Broken one Healed

It was rainy Wednesday evening and all I could think about was you and seeing you. Our talk was the only thing I could think about as it got closer with every hour that was passing, it was scary not sure what to expect.

As I make my way to the coffee shop seeing you sitting there waiting for me with a big bright smile and a glass of cold beer. I could see you were more nervous than me but trying to hide it behind that cute smile of yours. As I took my seat the first words to escape from your mouth were “I’m sorry babe” that melted my heart, we both had so much to say sorry for little did I know by the end of the evening you hit me with one big secret that requires a millions sorries.

As always you force the food down my throat, asking me over and over if I’m good? My answer was accompanied with a weak smile and a “I’m okay babe” .

You said you had two things to tell me a confession and a question. The first question was what are my expectation of our relationship? It got me off guard and got me  thinking, my answer was short “I don’t expect a lot from you” my response really hurt you as you set with disbelief on your face but that’s how I felt. Your expectations of our relationship really surprised me, how you want to build on our love.

I swear I was not ready for your confession, something I never expected from you. As the words slid out of your mouth “I cheated on you in January because I was horny” in that moment it felt like someone took a knife and put it in my heart and turned it around going deeper with each turn not sure what to feel, you kept asking me how do I feel I didn’t reponse. I was sitting there thinking that I’m not enough for you and maybe if I had sex with you this would’ve never happened to me, knowing that you gave away a piece of you to someone who wasn’t me with all of this going on in my mind my response to you was I’m hurt that’s it you hurt me in a way that no one else has done before.

The weird part is I have asked you time and time again are you good with the fact that we are not having sex and your answer was yes just for you to go and fuck someone else. If you had only ask me for sex ?

I couldn’t stop crying for days, unable to control my emotions. Thought to myself that I gave my heart to a fool who couldn’t control being horny, the fact that you not only lied to me but you also lied to the person you had sex with.

I look at you differently now.

I did the unbelievable thing by forgiving you and allowing us to start afresh because I believe in us and our love.

As your cold lips met my warm lips I knew I didn’t make a mistake by trying again.

The promise we made to each other that night is what I’m holding on to and the love we have for each other.

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Date Night ❤

Was a little confused, not sure what to expect seeing that we haven’t met for the year so far and we were distant for about a week or so.

As I was waiting for you different thoughts cross my minds, feelings I could not explain I swear it felt like it was our first date.

As always you showed up with that bright smile of yours, hold me in your arms in a tight hug, as I try to fake a confuse smile.
You took out an oreo cookie which is by the way my favourite with a cute innocent smile you said “let’s share my cookie” you had me with that line here there in the middle of traffic.

We made our way into the building, as we enter the elevator you had that naughty smile on your face. You pulled me close into a big hug before crushing your soft lips against mine felt like you were taking me to the roof of the building with that kiss and it reminded me that I was still yours and that you are still mine. We are each others persons.

We take our seats and the movie starts and not long after I see you can’t keep your eyes open falling asleep which is always a sweet thing to see you do. Every time you whisper something to me this warm fuzzy feeling take over my body at the sound of your voice and your warm breath coming down my neck all the way to my back.

“Let’s walk slow as I want to spend more time with you” as those words escape your mouth, I hold on to your hands.

Was most definitely time for the awkward conversation that I was avoiding for most of the night but was not as bad as I thought it would be. Guess we needed that talk.

As we continued to walk light rain drops started to fall softly on us couldn’t help but smile and got even more happy when you said you were ready for us to go home and that we should take another walk around the city.

Our walk took us to an dark alley as we stopped and looked at each other in disbelieve at this moment we are sharing. You picked me up in your strong yet weak arms holding me tight against your chest, putting me down slowly while crushing your lips against mine while playfully saying ” I’m not getting away from you” not knowing that I didn’t want to get away, that your arms were my home, my happy place started letting the kiss take over as I hold on to you for dear life.

I have a problem and you are my solution. I can’t get enough of you. lip biting, breathless moments, it’s more than getting physical, it’s the connection of our minds and the way you put me at ease.
You are a wild wind that brings that calm breeze in my life.

My hands were made for yours in a way not to fit perfectly but still able to be joint together.

The cab ride back home was simply wonderful as you tried to sit as close as you could to me felt like were one in that moment. I swear I was looking at you talking but not hearing anything just seeing your mouth move.

Movie night was more than what I expected it to be.

I have learned nothing stay the same.

My secret love XoX

Little part of me, Uncategorized

Our Story Part 2

Took  me a year to be able to write about you. Hopefully you will enjoy part 2 in the series of “Our story”. My crazy, wild experience with my first crush in the big city.

Meeting you for the first time was one of those nervous moments but you made it so easy with that warmth smile of yours and those breathtaking chocolate brown eyes of yours made me feel at peace.

For some crazy reason I had no words to say, my mouth was more dry than the Fish River in that moment I realise I didn’t need to say anything to break the silence.
Smile.. you cooked for me while trying to know me better, loved the way you worked around my shyness to get me to be comfortable with you.

That was the day I knew I liked you more than I should. Your chest soon became my favourite place and your arms were my new home, where I felt safe. Your lips were my oxygen.

Talking to you was the best part of my day, something I was looking forward to and you never disappointed me with your words.

I remember that day I wasn’t feeling myself and I texted you to come and give me a hug and not long there you were standing with your arms open. Lol I remember you asking me “what’s wrong ? Did my dog die or something” . Your mad face was just the one. Crazy but my punishment for the hug was me cooking for you which I enjoyed doing.

The kiss
Your lips melted into mine for that moment in time I felt like I was on cloud 9. You took your time with every kiss as our tongues met in our mouths dancing as my tongue twisted around yours.
That kiss rise the roof, as you worked my mouth like it was never worked before.

You were mine but I was not yours.

To be continued….

Little part of me, Uncategorized

Who Am I

All these thoughts are running through my mind,  so many questions, I’m scared to be myself or I’m scared of what people will say when I’m myself however I’m not sure when I’m myself.

Guess I have been fooling myself all this time, knowing that there is a part of me that no body knows about including myself.

The process is so hard, people make it seems so easy using the words find yourself, know yourself, it’s so freaking crazy.

There is this part of me that I have been keeping to myself,  because I have always believed that I don’t want to add my problems to people even if it’s my own family. I would rather hear their problems and try to help them.

I wish I knew what it means to be true to yourself or maybe I just scared to be myself around people.  The world is not ready to meet the person I’m  meant to be. For now I’m just going to be Joe.

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My Grade 10 Experience

Not so long still remember the day I got my results. It was a Wednesday me and my friends took my mom to the train station cause she was travelling to Karasburg, on our way back we went to check our results at the regional office and I was super nervous. I walked over to my school’s name and check for my name no # it must be a mistake I can’t fail I  looked closer it was just a 22 couldn’t move for a moment till my friends started screaming yes, yes! It’s a pass. They looked at me and said stop playing you pass right?  I told them no they walked over to make sure. The walk home was weiri quiet .

I got home started cleaning the house like nothing is wrong then it hit me when I got a text from my cousin did you pass? Starting breaking down crying uncontrollable I think it was for about a good 30mins of crying because I did study hard but clearly not hard enough. What hurt more was the ” it’s going to be okay” ” it’s not the end of the world” but it was my end of the world.

Come January was not sure what to do first I wanted a remark but then a good friend just told me to go to Namcol. I was so confused but I did go to Namcol and to be honest that was the best year of my life not the easiest by any means.

The next year I was back at school grade 11 even got a B in history lol.

I’m sharing my story with you just to show you that failure doesn’t define you and you shouldn’t allow it to define who you will become in life. Cry if you have to get it out of your system. I know the pain it’s not easy but it gets better and better.

Congratulations to those who passed.

Fun, Little part of me, Uncategorized

My Naked Weekend

This was one of those unplanned moments that just fell into place perfect.

Babe’s eagerness to please me was simply beautiful, as we got some ingredients for dinner I could see how nervously babe was happy.

Back home the cooking started with some new rules for the night from Babe ” tonight we are watching movies in a different way and you are not allowed to fight me on this one” babe said,  this got me really nervous to find out what rules are these and babe continues with the rules for the night “We will watch the movies naked completely naked no clothes on” for a moment there I couldn’t believe what babe just said turning to get my head around it because I was never naked in front of another person but I agreed to the rules of the buildings night which lit babe’s face up like a Christmas tree.

Music, the sound of me chopping up the onions, wine being poured in the glass and our lips making the first connection of the night felt like with every kiss I wanted more.

My favourite place in world is babe’s arms, I  refer to it as my Paris, my happy place.

As we sit down on opposite side to watch the first movie while have dinner. Babe ” you are way too far from me” just those words made me realise I was with the right person, in the right moment.

We both still fully dress, till babe jumps up in front of me with a naughty smile started to remove his clothes starting with the t-shirt and ending with the hot pants. I swear I couldn’t focus on the movie anymore with this beautiful wonder of nature standing completely up  naked sharing with me the most intimate part and in the process breaking down the walls I have built one brick at a time.

Coming to sit next to me saying no pressure only do it if you feel comfortable. Thinking myself should I do this or no? And I already knew the answer to the question a clean yes. As I start to undressed myself nervously…smiling but deep down knowing that this is what I want.

Couldn’t believe I was sitting naked, butt naked and loving every moment of it with my person. My eyes were more on babe’s body than the movie. As I travelled babe’s body with my eyes, visiting every amazing part of it not wanting to miss out on a single part till I made my final stop my favourite part of the body, lips. I softly pressed my lips on babe’s lips as I was awaiting permission to enter babe’s mouth, our tongues meet and it was fireworks in our mouths. That kiss felt like a movie strong, powerful yet passionately soft with an element of laughter.

Sitting completely naked in each others hands, being at our most vulnerable, ready to seeing each other scars and loving how imperfect we are.

Weirdly enough that was one of my best sex free experience.

Getting lost in each others body but not filled with lust for it.

That night our bodies united in to one without sex being involved.

Love is a beautiful ride with ups and downs accompanied by amazing twist and turns. Make sure your riding mate is ready and prepared for the journey.

PS love every part of your amazing body. It’s the perfect gift for my eyes.

Fun, Uncategorized

The Ingredients For A Healthy Relational

A week

A month

6 months

A year

Maybe just maybe a lifetime.

But the truth is only you can determine how long it will last because this is an emotional investment you are making with another person. Possibly one of the biggest ones you can make because nothing hurts more like a broken heart.

Questions many of us ask before entering a new relationship. How long before my heart gets broken? How many happiness moments we will shared before we start fighting about silly things? How sure are we that this is the right person for us or are we just gambling with our hearts in the hopes that it be just end up being the right person because life is a game after all.

Here are a couple of factors that can determine how long your relationship will last. The first one being

Communication

Communication, communication I can’t stress this enough because this is how you strength your bond with your person and I’m not referring to the good morning text or the good night text but sharing something really personal which will also build trust within the relationship, especially if you are really serious about the relationship. There is nothing a like little lie to break up what you are trying to build with your person. There should be a no secret rule in your relationship this will bring you closer together.

This may be hard in the start believe me it’s not as easy as I’m writing it now.

So talk more about your goals, your dreams to show the person  that there is a place for them in your life just not only  in the present moment but also in the near future.

The sex

Let’s be honest that sex is one of the most important factor of any relationship because with sex your connection gets deeper with your person. You are sharing a secret part of your body with another person so deep that your souls are connected in the process. Happy Couples have great sex and not boring funless sex which leads to the person wanting to experiment outside of relationship. One thing to never do is to be shy in the bedroom, I know it may be hard but it’s not impossible to do. Try role playing once in a while to keep the fire alive.

The family and friends factor

Now this is the one that can make or break your relationship depending how much influence you allow them to have. It’s okay for your family and friends advice you on the person but don’t allow it to cloud your judgement or for you to make a decision based on their opinion. No relationship comes without baggage just like no person comes without a past. Everyone has the ability to change for better, it just takes the right person to do that sometimes. So learn to separate your relation from each other, if they go well together even better for you. One last thing to keep in mind is that your friends and family don’t have to be best friends with your person but they just have to be civilize towards one another.

The money factor

Let’s me honest this has cause many relationships to end on bitter note. When you are in a relationship with someone it’s both your responsibility to treat each other. If you are really serious about the future of your relationship you should try to work on this already slowly. As much as you want to spend on the person try to save together as a couple for a treat.

The love factor

When love is true and real happiness is the order of the day. Nothing kills you more than being in a loveless relationship,  forcing feelings onto someone that doesn’t want to put in the same amount of work and time into the relationship. This is the kind of stress and pain you don’t want or need in your life. We all deserve to experience true love in our life so don’t rob yourself of this amazing experience by being in a wrong relationship. When love is there it just makes things a lot easier.

Without love there is no relationship.

Last factor being “FUN”

This is so important!!! Fun moments are needed in any relationship so don’t deny yourself this part of the relationship. Play with each other because laughter is one of the best medicine,  like the saying goes “make them laugh and they are yours already”.

Those just some of the ingredients you need for a healthy long strong and loving relationship.

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The art of being grateful

An experienced I had this past weekend made me question how ungrateful we are sometimes and in the process we take for granted the things and people we have in our lives not knowing that there is someone wishing they had what you have.
Now what is ungrateful according to dictionary.com ungrateful is being
“unappreciative; not displaying gratitude; not giving due return or recompense for benefits conferred: ungrateful heirs. 2. unpleasant; distasteful; repellent: an ungrateful task.”
Now we have a understanding of what it means to be ungrateful, just in case you didn’t know the true meaning of it.
From a very young age I was always taught to be grateful and thankful for what I have because there is someone who doesn’t have what you have and most importantly to share the little I have to bring joy to someone else.  These some of the lessons I learned from my grandmother, mother and uncle.
Being kind and thankful doesn’t take anything away from you instead it adds so much joy and blessings to your life.
We always take the people we love for granted, not knowing sooner or later their time with us will be cut short. Don’t wait for someone you love to be sick on their death bed or to stand in front of their open grave for you to realize how much you love this person and how grateful  you are to have them in of your life.
There is no greater theft them losing someone you love that you never truly appreciated. Don’t let your attitude of ungratefulness stop you from celebrating someone you love while they are still live.
Let’s stop waiting for special days to celebrate people in our life and it let become a everyday thing.
There are kids who wish they had one more moment with their parents, just to show them how grateful they are because the world is a cold place. I’m sure you would much rather visit your parents at home then at the graveyard with tears in your eyes.
It takes you less than 5 minutes out of your busy schedule to just call someone to tell them how grateful you are to have them in your life and sometimes simple sms would do before you going drinking because none of us are promised tomorrow.
Stop waiting for the right time, mood or for their birthday to show appreciation to someone you love.
Don’t let your pride robbery you of happy memories you could’ve create with someone.
Let’s try to be grateful people because the world needs more of us.
Fun, Uncategorized

My innocence almost robbed

After a long day of classes,  chasing assignments deadlines.  I decided to go to Base FM to finish one of my assignments, the process took a little bit long than I thought it would with the computer acting up on me but I was able to finish it around 22:30.
As I step out I could feel the cool breeze in the air as I cross the road to look for a taxi to take me home.
I swear that was the longest wait of the entire life. The street so so quiet the only sound was that of dogs playing in the street.
I looked left, right and left again but no sign of a taxi coming.. finally a couple of they come by but none of were going to where I’m staying.
I continue to wait but in the distance I see a group of boys coming my way, holding my water bottle tight in my hands as they are getting closer and closer, a taxi comes by hoping and praying that this will be the one that will say yes but it was just a another no.
My heart beats faster and faster like a ticking clock,  the the group of boys just standing across the road from me talking amongst each other while looking at me.
The cold breeze hits my face, I couldn’t feel my dry lips at all, with wild thoughts running through my mind
*PS not the song of DJ Khalah lol

But back to the story.
For a second I wanted to run back to Base FM but could not move my feet to do the action. They start to walk away from where I was standing. A breath of relief hit my chest,  as I slowly let go of my water bottle, in that moment a taxi come by who was willing to take me home